By Victoria Joanna  BBA, CNP, RNCP

If you watch Oprah, practice yoga or have read books by spiritual and personal development leaders such as Deepak Chopra, Eckhart Tolle or Wayne Dyer, chances are you have heard about the power of surrender.  Oprah often tells the story of wanting desperately to be in the movie “The Color Purple” until the day when she fully and completely let that desire go.  In that moment, she got the call from the directors.

Coincidence?  I would say yes, if it wasn’t for the countless examples I have personally seen in my own life and the lives of my friends, family and clients.   As simple as it sounds, it is actually quite difficult to do.  For in the act of surrendering we have to let go of something that we have wanted so deeply.  We often feel like we are giving up.

The art of surrender therefore is in understanding the subtle difference between surrendering and giving up.  When we give up, we are saying to the Universe that we no longer believe the thing that we want is possible.  We lose all hope and we stop taking action.  Without action and hope, nothing happens.  However, when we surrender we never give up hope for what we want.  We hold the vision in our minds and we determine what steps will get us there.  We then do what we can ever day to move us closer to what we want.  We don’t stop moving and we don’t give up.  But here is the key – we let go of needing to control exactly when it will happen or how it will happen.  What we surrender is the idea that we know what’s best for us.  We believe in something greater than that is guiding us towards the life we are meant to live.  

The distinction is subtle and yet very powerful.  It changes the energy of our thoughts.   When we want something almost desperately, our grasping and need is a very suffocating energy that often repels the very thing we want.   When we are in a place of surrender, we are light and at ease, our energy flows and attracts rather than repels.

Think for a moment about someone you know or have encountered in the past.  Someone who desperately wants to get married?  What are they like to be around?  Or someone who wants to please and be liked, to the point where people want to run the other way.  These people usually end up pushing away the things they want to attract.

So how do you let go without giving up?  Surrender is an on-going process.  You won’t do it perfectly the first time, so let go of that expectation up front.   And most importantly, once you have finally surrendered to the process, pay attention and watch for clues and opportunities that show up to take you towards your goal.

Here are some tips to start practicing surrender in your life: 

Identify something that you have wanted very strongly for quite some time

In a journal, write down what you want.  Be specific.  Write down a date by when you would like it to happen. 

Take a moment to read over the goal, visualize it and then surrender the outcome.  Ask for guidance and be grateful in advance that this will occur in a time and manner that is in your highest good, even though you may not know what that is yet.

On a daily basis upon waking or going to bed, take five minutes to quiet your mind and find gratitude for your present circumstances.  Surrender to knowing that all is happening at the perfect time.

In this grateful, calm and open space you will be creating the energy for your dreams and desires to flow into your life.  Be patient. Be open.